I was a child, dealing with complex things
I've written a lot about my childhood, adolescence, and the emotional challenges I faced during my formative years—even touching on a few important events from the beginning of adulthood. The funny thing is, I feel like I’ve only scratched the surface. At the same time, I sometimes feel like I’ve talked about it too much. I’ve even caught myself wondering what people who read me must think—maybe I’ve leaned too heavily on the whole “my blog, my traumas” thing.
I wouldn’t want to be seen as someone who’s whiny, overly emotional, resentful, or stuck in the past. I don’t identify with any of those things, even though I’ve definitely been a couple of them at one point or another. But how others perceive me is out of my hands—and I’ve come to accept that.
I talk a lot about my mental health issues and trauma because the path I had to take to feel like a functioning adult wasn’t just difficult—it was fascinating. I believe that now more than ever, in an online world filled with the same paraphrased information copy-pasted across dozens of sites, it’s important to share personal experiences with illnesses that often begin quietly. I remember desperately searching for stories about people going through anxiety or depression because no one in my close circle had experienced them as severely as I had. Needless to say, a quick Google search never gave me anything helpful.
I like to think that my experience helps others at least feel validated—to know they’re not crazy for feeling the way they do, that they’re not losing their minds, and more importantly: that they’re going to be okay. And I won’t lie, I also enjoy diving into these topics because I find psychology fascinating in so many ways. If I hadn’t chosen to write for a living, I probably would’ve pursued a career in it.
It’s funny—people often say psychologists take that path because they’ve lived through these kinds of disorders themselves. Now that I’ve had to deal with anxiety, I can’t stop talking about it or trying to understand it better. Of course, that’s not a rule, but it makes sense to me that having experienced it firsthand might make someone want to help others going through the same thing.
I also write a lot about mental health because it’s something I’ve been working through recently. It won’t always be a recurring topic here, and I’ll probably stop writing about it once I’ve covered everything I personally feel is relevant—because I’m not an expert, I don’t want to be one, and I don’t want this blog to revolve around that.
I really don’t want to sound like a broken record. But yeah, I was a child, dealing with complex things I couldn't communicate. So now, I just can’t stop talking about it.
Thank you for reading.